jedi moments

i had a bad feeling tonight,
hopefully it’s not a harbinger of doom.
she’s really bad at answering the phone.
and i’m impatient.
we’re pretty much made for eachother.
this whole thing feels unreal, like a setup or something.
i’m fighting the feeling, because i really want to just be happy.

grace

i don’t deserve the people in my life,
or  anything i’ve been given, really.
thanks (i can’t say it as big as i should)

too much of a good thing

when it rains it pours.
what am i supposed to do?

run turkey, run

    man, this holiday would have been so much more awkward if ben franklin had gotten his way. our family doesn’t usually eat turkey, anyway. too dry for me.
so i’m realizing how difficult it’s going to be having a girlfriend who lives in chicago. christmas and summers are going to be tough, especially since i am pretty much physically aching after what, two days? i keep laughing at myself, i’m not really used to being “one of those couples.” the fact that i’m cognizant of how ridiculous i’m being is of some comfort to me, at least. it’s kind of like how you can’t be completely insane if you realize you are. but meanwhile you’re still muttering to the rhododendrons that the teacup’s out to get you. ah, well.
emotions are strange things. i’m realizing the necessity of something to reign them in.
i keep telling myself i need to write, to record, etc. as always i have a few projects in the works that never seem to get finished.
i need to simplify my life.

surprised by joy

so, in less than 24 hours,
I got a new guitar,
and I’m no longer single.
I’ve been pretty much without words,
just smiling a lot and laughing at myself.
transcendence and immanence kind of conflicting here.
meh, screw suffering for art or whatever. maybe it’s ok to just be happy.

8)

incoherent

Yesterday was utterly surreal.
I have no idea how to describe it otherwise.
In one day, I
1) discussed objective vs. subjective reality,
2) took a geology test (meh)
3) waited in line at best buy for 4-5 hours (cold)
4) realized it was in vain (by about three people)
5) became a Sam’s Club member (semi-willingly)
6) participated in an unruly mob
7) questioned seriously my sanity, and more so that of others
8. learned to play Guitar Hero
9) read St. Augustine
10) saw James Bond at midnight

There was more. It was a fairly big more too. It’s kind of bigger than the list, which is why it’s not on it. I’m in a pretty Descartes place right now about it, mainly because I’m not at all sure it actually happened. Maybe I’ll be able to talk about it in more certain terms later.

I am officially the worst communicator in current circulation.

eliminativativists

C.S. Lewis > debunkers.

At some point you’ve got to stop seeing through stuff and actually see.

oh em gee

i am excited about a story idea for the first time in a while.
it stems from an aim conversation, and loosely involves eggplants.
i won’t ruin the surprise, but it promises to be, at the very least, fun to write

first things

i had a wicked jam going in the stairwell
i need to record, and stop talking about how i need to record
yesterday was interesting,
good food, good movie, good company.
God is good.

oh, man

hooray uncertainty!
interesting couple of days,
again wishing girls came with subtitles,
or that the guy with my guitar would call me back.
i like Pascal, he’s not bad for a frenchman.
democrats have the majority again,
good for them.
maybe republicans will get some of their hipster cred back.
i am antipolitik.
and pro Jesus. woohoo!